by L.D. Kirklin at ldkirklin.com
Filters
Life made a lot more sense to me when I started looking at the world through a camera lens. Perhaps it was – and pardon the pun – because I had to slow down and focus on the details. Just like any complicated project, it really helps when you slow down and concentrate on what you’re doing. I don’t know about you, but, to me, life is on that list of complicated projects.
Recently though, it occurred to me that, like life, people make a lot more sense when you think of them like cameras. No, that’s not to say that they are mechanical or that you can put a price on them, but they do tend to have some comparable features. For example, like a camera, people have buttons you can push and lenses that often need a good cleaning. What really got me thinking about it though, was the filters.
While filters have long been used in photography, it’s only in the last few years that the average cell phone user has become aware of them. Apps like Snapchat make filters the norm instead of the occasional trick of the trade. Snap a picture and swipe left or right and you can find seemingly endless filters that will alter your image. Make a dark picture light or make a red picture blue. Add stars or flowers or confetti to your picture if you so choose. You can even find filters that will turn you into a talking bunny, a dancing chicken, or even a beat-boxing blueberry if that’s your jam.
The thing about filters is, they don’t change the way we look at an image, they simply change the way we see it. It’s that very fact that got me thinking about people being like cameras. The likeness is that both have filters, the difference is that I can choose and change the filters I want to use on my camera, whereas the filters on people cannot be chosen or changed, at least not by me.
Filters for people are a combination of life experiences. For example, someone who experienced joy in a situation will often look through a filter of happiness, while someone who experienced sorrow will look through a filter of sadness. A person who once experienced harm might look at a situation through a filter of caution, while someone who experienced care will look through a filter of security. The situation is the same, but the person’s perspective of it differs based on the filter they are using.
Because everyone has filters that no one else knows about, understanding people can be difficult. We might wonder why someone is afraid of dogs, or why someone doesn’t like to talk on the phone. We might wonder why someone acts insulted when we mean no harm, or why someone is unreceptive to our efforts of encouragement. The truth is many arguments occur, and a lot of buttons get pushed because of filters that prevent us from seeing a situation any way but our own way.
I recently saw a movie where the two main characters had been at odds with each other for years. While both claimed to know the other person and cited their views and personality as reasons for their discord, neither really knew the other. Finally, the friends of both got together and devised a plan to lock the two main characters in a room together. When faced with no other choice than to wait, the two began talking. As it turned out, what each thought of the other was not accurate, and, after learning the truth, they ended up becoming good friends.
The bottom line is, we have no control over the filters of others, but we have complete control over ours. We can choose to remove our filter of disdain and replace it with a filter of understanding – and there is a lot of power in that choice. When we look to understand we have the power to offer grace, the power to help the situation, and even the power to help others want to choose a better filter for themselves.
So, when next you find yourself in a situation that looks a lot like tension and has the potential for misunderstanding, remember that we are all like cameras. We all have filters, and we all have buttons – and checking your filter is a powerful way to prevent anyone from pushing your buttons.
Never underestimate the power of perspective!
